Whether you’re new to mentoring or have been doing it for years, there are always simple ways to grow. In this blog, we’ll explore how you can connect more deeply with the young people you support, show up more professionally in school settings, and reflect on your own growth as a mentor. We’ll also share some powerful statistics about the real difference mentors make, and offer tips you can start using right away.
It’s not just about showing up. It’s about how you show up.
Being a mentor is one of the most human roles there is. You’re not there to fix or rescue – but to walk beside a young person as they find their way. And that takes more than just good intentions.
It takes consistency, professionalism, and the kind of connection that young people remember long after the sessions are done.
Whether you’re just starting out or have years under your belt, here are some simple but powerful ways to grow in your role – and have a deeper impact where it matters most.
1. Understand the True Impact of a Mentor
When you’re in the day-to-day of sessions, it’s easy to forget how big a difference you’re actually making.
Here’s what the research says:
- Young people with a mentor are 55% more likely to enrol in university than those without one.
(Source: The Mentoring Effect Report, MENTOR: The National Mentoring Partnership, 2014) - Mentored youth are 46% less likely to start using drugs, and 52% less likely to skip school.
(Source: Big Brothers Big Sisters Youth Outcomes Survey Report, 2019) - The same report found mentored young people had stronger relationships and higher levels of confidence and trust.
2. Connect Before You Correct
Every young person brings their own story. Some come with trauma, mistrust, or simply a wall built from years of being let down.
To break through that, start with connection:
- Be consistent. Trust is built over time, not in a single session.
- Listen fully. Often, what they don’t say is just as important as what they do.
- Use their interests as entry points. Whether it’s gaming, art, or football – meet them where they’re at.
💡 Tip:
Try using open-ended questions like, “What’s been on your mind lately?” or “What’s something you wish adults understood better?”.
3. Be Professional, Even When It’s Hard
Mentoring often happens in school settings, alongside teachers, safeguarding leads and support staff. Being professional in these environments is key to building trust and impact.
Here’s how:
- Be punctual. Arriving on time sends a message that your mentee – and their time – matters.
- Follow up. Keep school staff in the loop, especially if issues arise. They’re your allies.
- Respect boundaries. Keep conversations appropriate, and maintain confidentiality – unless safeguarding is involved.
4. Work on Your Presence, Not Just Your Plan
You can have the best session plan in the world – but if your energy’s off, the young person will feel it.
Improving your presence means:
- Leaving your day at the door. Give them your full attention.
- Checking your body language. Sit at eye level. Keep posture open. Avoid looking at your phone.
- Slowing down. Silence is okay. Let them take their time.
This kind of attunement builds trust – and it models emotional regulation too.
5. Keep Learning and Reflecting
The best mentors are always growing.
Ways to keep improving:
- Ask for feedback. Not just from supervisors, but also from mentees (age-appropriate, of course).
- Reflect regularly. What went well this week? What felt off?
- Stay curious. Read about trauma-informed practice, youth development, and communication skills.
6. Protect Your Own Wellbeing
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Being a mentor can be emotionally demanding, especially when working with vulnerable young people.
Some ways to look after yourself:
- Debrief with peers or supervisors. Don’t carry everything alone.
- Set emotional boundaries. It’s okay to care without carrying it home.
- Celebrate the small wins. A smile. A shift in behaviour. A thank you. These moments matter.
7. Be Clear, Be Kind, Be Consistent
Ultimately, young people thrive when adults around them are three things:
- Clear – about expectations, boundaries, and communication.
- Kind – in how they show up and respond, especially in difficult moments.
- Consistent – even when things get messy or progress is slow.
That’s what builds trust – and trust changes lives.
A Final Word: You’re Already Making a Difference
If you’re reading this, it means you care. And that matters more than you know.
Every conversation. Every moment of patience. Every time you show up when it would have been easier not to – that’s where the magic happens.
And if you’re looking for a supportive team, grounded training, and a place to grow as a mentor, we’re here.
FAQs
- Q: What qualifications do I need to be a great mentor?
You don’t need formal qualifications to make a difference – just the right mindset, good training, and a heart for young people. At Lexia, we provide ongoing support to help you grow. - Q: How do I know if I’m making an impact?
You might not always see instant results, but signs include increased trust, attendance, engagement, or even small shifts in attitude. Reflection and feedback from school staff can help you track progress. - Q: How can I stay motivated during tough mentoring weeks?
Remember your why. Speak to peers. Revisit success stories. And know that even showing up on a tough day is success.
